Saturday, June 18, 2011

Fathers' Day reflections

Erica & Adam aboard DejaVu III, ca. 1985
It is so awesome.  No, not as in the now-common parlance, but rather in its original meaning:  AWEsome. Being a father, that is.

You bring these small, completely helpless creatures into the world (well, OK, the mother does have a small part to play here, but this is Fathers' Day, after all).

And then they rapidly become *people*.  People with dreams and hurts.  People with skills and shortcomings.

As a parent, as a father, it is your job to smooth the way for them (not to do for them, because this steals from them the joy of achievement), to hold their hands and help them over the rough spots, and to guide them.  But the best guidance is not what you say, but rather what you do.  It is far better to model the behavior that you want your children to adopt than to simply demand it (although sometimes both are necessary, realizing up front that you are then modeling autocratic behavior).

But the most important thing about parenting is this:  Children inherently trust and love their parents.  Never, NEVER betray this trust; never take advantage of their love.

And yes, I do believe that there is a marine gene.
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2 comments:

The Ames Family said...

Very wise words. You should be very proud of the kids you raised. :)

Robert Salnick said...

I am (we are) *very* proud of them. Thanks!

And you should be proud of how yours are turning out too!

bob

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